Parody

WHOREBINGER – The Wednesday Wordapod

Today’s (The Wednesday) Wordapod may be regarded as seasonal, or at least timely. This one is also new, and not one of the 250-plus wordapods featured in Wordapodia, Volume One.

 Whorebinger

Whorebinger (n)one who is given to indulging frequently in paid romantic encounters Continue reading

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COWTERIZE – The Wednesday Wordapod

Today’s (The Wednesday) Wordapod was suggested by my brother Josh, with an assist from my niece Rachelle. This one is hot off the press, and not one of the 250-plus wordapods featured in Wordapodia, Volume One.

 

Cowterize

Cowterize (v)to burn the skin or flesh of a domestic bovine animal in order to stop a serious infection

Please Note:  One can cowterize domestic bovines verbally, but it wouldn’t be advised — for either medical or ethical reasons.

Sample Sentence:  When Elsie was suffering from a bad wound in her rear flank, Farmer Schmegeggie cowterized it with an electrically charged wire.

Also, Please Note:  The practice of electrocautery is frowned upon by some bovine lovers. Frankly, I am more concerned about those who smile upon this practice.

 

….

 

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3 GREAT WAYS TO BUY HOT ICE CREAM:

 

  1. Buy it directly from Create Space– for now, at a great discount. Hot Ice Cream lists at $14.95; punch in discount code WF88WA3Q and save $4 per copy!

 

  1. For personalized, signed copies, please send a check for just $15 per copy (this covers shipping to anywhere in the US) directly to the author:  Matt Goldberg, 1 Saddle Lane, Cherry Hill, NJ 08002. Please include any special instructions if applicable. Please send just $10 for each additional copy: $25 for two books, $35 for three, etc.

 

  1. Purchase it on amazon.com.  Amazon may run their own promos, but there is no direct discount code to apply.

Please contact Matt via matt@tipofthegoldnberg.com for all questions and requests for book orders, fiundraising ideas, speaking engagements and media requests.

A Kindle version is planned for mid-May, 2015.

 

 

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PHENONYMOUS – The Wednesday Wordapod

Today’s (The Wednesday) Wordapod is phenomenal. And anonymous. Well, not really. But if it were, it would be PHENONYMOUS.

Phenonymous

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LIEBATION – The Wednesday Wordapod

Today’s (The Wednesday) Wordapod relates to a strange kind of trickery. Bottom’s up, or is it?

Liebation

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Barry White-fish Salad

Today’s (The Wednesday) Wordapod is all about eclectic celebrations. Happy New Year’s, everybody!

Barry White-Fish Salad

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PARKING LOTKE – The Wednesday Wordapod

As Chanukah concludes, today’s (The Wednesday) Wordapod celebrates Boris-Yuri Fedorov, one of the brave men who gave us the “parking lotke.”

 

PARKING LOTKE

Parking Lotke (n) a potato pancake, often eaten during Chanukah, which is consumed at an outdoor location

Who Knew…?

The parking lotke, like a lot of traditional foods associated with the Jewish religion, started as a necessity, but continued because of tradition and commerce. I discussed this with the eminent Russian Jewish scholar, Boris-Yuri Fedorov.

Matt:  Mr. Fedorov? Or should I call you—

Boris-Yuri:  If please, my friends call me Basha.

Matt:  Basha, the former Soviet Union was quite repressive to Soviet Jews. How were you able to keep your traditions alive?

Boris-Yuri: In former Soviet Union, Jews not allowed to pray freely. We convene together in parking lots outside synagogue to partake in some parking lotkes and borscht.

Matt: For the benefit of some of my readers, what is borscht?

Boris-Yuri:  Borscht Eastern European soup taste like paint thinner. But add some sour cream, and you’ve got something.

Matt:  So, where did you used to convene?

Boris-Yuri:  Was hard to celebrate with my people in those times in Moscow. We meet discreetly behind abandoned Politburo building. Natasha and Anatoly light menorah, the men spin our frozen dreidels, and Olga Greenberg bring her beautiful golden brown parking lotkes. Was tasting great, and we never got caught.

Matt:  What was the toughest part of celebrating in this way?

Boris-Yuri: I think my friend, Viktor, is KGB agent.

Matt:  Why do you say that?

Boris-Yuri: That schlemiel never bring applesauce.

Thanks to the bravery of Basha and his friends, parking lotkes are now enjoyed throughout the world in all kinds of weather, in total freedom—and with applesauce.

Wordapodia, Vol. 1

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To get your own signed copy of Wordapodia, Volume One: An Encyclopedia of Real Fake Words, please follow the links or simply email me:  Matt@tipofthegoldberg.com

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MENORAHTY – The Wednesday Wordapod

Today’s (The Wednesday) Wordapod asks:  So, what would YOU call the small percentage of the US (let alone the world) population that Jews comprise?

Happy Chanukah to all!

MENORAHTY

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VELCRO MAGNON – The Wednesday Wordapod

Today’s (The Wednesday) Wordapod asks:  So, what would YOU call our ancestors who always stuck together?

 

VELCRO MAGNON

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GULAGARITHM – The Wednesday Wordapod

Today’s (Wednesday) Wordapod provides a new term for the brilliant scientific theorems written by prisoners. Yes, just what we need.

 

GULAGARITHM

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SNACK-O-LANTERN – The Wednesday Wordapod

For those who are trick-or-treating or have loved ones doing so, have fun, but be ever mindful of those snack-o-lanterns. And yes, the Wednesday Wordapod is …

 

SNACK-O-LANTERN

 

Snack-o-lantern (n) an edible, plastic pumpkin-shaped device with openings cut to represent the human eyes, nose, and mouth. It is illuminated by a candle or other light.

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WARNING TRUCK – The Wednesday Wordapod

With the 2014 Major League Baseball season nearing its climax, the Wednesday Wordapod is …

 

WARNING TRUCK

Warning Truck (n)in certain baseball stadiums, a truck that is placed in the outfield a few feet in front of the home run fence

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ROUND TRIPPER – The Wednesday Wordapod

As Major League Baseball nears the World Series, we turn to the (former?) national pastime for The Wednesday Wordapod, which is…

 

ROUND TRIPPER

Round Tripper (n)one of many nicknames given to a home run in baseball—with a fascinating story behind it

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YOM KIPPURIM – The Wednesday Wordapod

The Wednesday Wordapod is …

(Note: You don’t have to be Jewish to appreciate this one, but it may help. Enjoy, and continued Happy/Healthy/Fulfilling New Year to you and your families!)

 

YOM KIPPURIM

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CHAIRISMATIC – The Wednesday Wordapod

The Wednesday Wordapod is …

 

Chairismatic

 

Chairismatic  (adj)of, or relating to, the quality of being quite at home in a recliner

 

Observation

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FREUDIAN SLIPCOVER – The Wednesday Wordapod

Today’s Wordapod features an interview with Dr. Klaus Stichmein, owner of The Klaus House of Furniture and Psychoanalysis.

If you like “Freudian Slipcover”…and who doesn’t…you really need to pick up a copy of Wordapodia, Volume One: An Encyclopedia of Real Fake Words, where you will find more than 250 creative, fun Wordapods.

 

Freudian Slipcover

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